Fight for Your Right to Party

By Barbara Groark

I found an old newspaper clipping of my mother’s: a letter to the editor written by her and published June 27, 1968, in the local Little Paper. The headline reads “Anti-Music Adults Scored by Resident,” about the graduation party my parents allowed me to have. Here’s the letter:

“I have just discovered what’s wrong with today’s teenagers—adults!

“After just having chaperoned a party for a group of about 80 kids, I find that it’s not wild, rowdy, 17- and 18-year-olds who cause problems, but nosey busy-bodies who have nothing better to do than call police five times in a period of one hour and 15 minutes. What was the complaint? Not beer-drinking, not fist-fights, not profanity, not horn-blowing, but music!
“How many adults (let alone children) go to bed at 9 p.m. on a summer night? By the time the fifth visit from the reluctant Cinnaminson policemen came, it was 10:15 p.m., and the band had to stop playing music completely or face the consequences.

“Small wonder today’s kids sometimes get into serious trouble for want of amusement. They’re damned if they do, and they’re damned if they don’t.

“These complaints didn’t come from neighbors in the immediate area, but at a distance down the hill in front of the house. In fact, neighborhood children helped set up chairs and outside lights, and looked forward with anticipation to listening to music of a real band. We could have sold peanuts to the gallery in the back yard.

“Some people spend their time do-gooding and starting petitions for this cause or that cause, all over the neighborhood, when they should stay at home and sweep around their own doors. Maybe the big gripe was not being invited to the party.

“If the boys and girls at this party are an example of ‘kids today,’ I’d like to have a party for them every week, if my food bill could stand it.

“Maybe we should reverse things and let the kids chaperone some adult parties. I’ll bet there would be a lot of red faces on January 1!”

We did find some beer cans in the flower beds the next day. If I recall correctly, someone’s brother (Eileen Urban’s?) had a band that we hired. Our house was not the party house of the neighborhood, except for family parties where there might be softball or badminton – or later volleyball and bocce – on the side or back lawn – and lots of food and drink. But the music was always the recorded kind, though we would put the stereo speakers at the window so people outside could hear. We also did that when washing our cars. Yet we never had the police called.

I remember being somewhat proud of that fact – police came to a party I gave. Another proud moment happened several years later, when my sister Kate and I gave a wedding shower for a cousin, and the police came to that too because of the noise – of a bunch of women chattering and kidding around! Apparently this is not to be endured for any length of time by some people. This was during a moment of apartment living, and the downstairs neighbor had complained.

There are 70 or 80 people coming to the Flanders on Columbus Day weekend. Maybe it is some of the same 80 people who came to that graduation party. We can probably manage to avoid the police this time, but you never know.

The Reunion Committee invites you, after checking in to wherever you are lodging on the Friday evening of that weekend, to come to the 8th floor of the Flanders Hotel after 6:00 for a progressive cocktail and hors d’oeuvres party – actually it will be wine and beer with some snacks and music – among several committee members’ rooms in an L-shaped part of the floor. Listen for music and look for open doorways, and visit the rooms along the hall.
As for activities the rest of the weekend, we will have details distributed that Friday night on the scheduled items, such as directions to Carol Carswell’s beautiful designer house on Sunday afternoon. Otherwise, your time is free on Saturday till the 6:30 dinner. There is still bike-ride interest for Saturday; the plan is now to take a consensus of what people want to do and design the route on Friday night. Here is some bike rental information: http://www.bikeocnj.org/

There is also an Athletic Center in OC, complete with a gym, and a 25-meter pool. Pre-registration is required to use the facilities, but the first visit is free.

That Saturday also the town of Ocean City has a Fall Block Party happening on Asbury Avenue between 5th and 14th Streets from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. with “crafts, food, music, and more.” Boardwalk. Beach. Golf. Gambling. It’s all nearby. If you want to drive for 40 minutes, you can check out some of Cape May’s Victorian Week, which starts that Saturday. You also might like the Lima Bean Festival in West Cape May. Something for everybody.

Don’t forget Sunday morning breakfast at the Flanders, even if you are not staying at the Flanders.

And what happens in Ocean City stays in Ocean City. I don’t think we will need our kids to chaperone us, but you never know. We won’t have to sneak beer. I guess we’ll be the grownups now, and we might make it past a 9:00 bedtime, but maybe not past midnight.